That syncing feeling

After succumbing to smart phone envy at work I decided it was time to get one myself. The kid in the phone store was very considerate, gently guiding me through the purchase, correctly assuming I was a first time user. Slowly, I have grown fond of my phone. It’s very pretty, with bright lights and all the bells and whistles. I can see what the weather’s like in Istanbul, record voice memos a la Agent Cooper (“Diane it’s 9am and I’m heading out for coffee and a slice of pie”), take new photos then download apps to make them look old, access recipes so I'm never all lost in the supermarket when it comes time to make dinner and pinpoint my exact location on mobile satnav for when I do get lost in the supermarket and can't remember where I parked my car. Oh wait, that still won't help me find my car but it is quite fun. When I plug my phone into my computer it synchronizes my life with little whirling cyber dervishes. But while I’m not a total Luddite I am afraid this and other tech gadgets fail to get my heart racing. 

Call me old fashioned but I like the feel of books, the smell of stationers and second hand shops, the thrill of receiving snail mail (that isn't a bill) and the possibilities of a new black pen. Likewise, when it comes to social media I'm a late adopter. Facebook and twitter leave me cold. It's all too immediate and bolshie, with too much margin for error, ill-conceived opinion and hastily cobbled together sentences laden with typos and bad grammar. IMHO - to use the vernacular. Never mind the gratuitous product placement. I like the safety net of editing.That’s why I chose this little blog by which to whisper to the world. (I'm ok if no one is listening.) And though I have every intention of penning witty weekly posts, reality is that unlike Kim Jong-un I'm  hesitant to push the (Publish) button. Besides, I'm not sure I've got a handle on the technology. So bear with me while I read the manual to see how it all works. Failing that I’ll contact the nearest teenager – oh look here comes one now...

PS: What is it with followers? Sounds like some doomsday cult of zombie-like religious zealots. Either that or a bunch of lemmings.